Nothing ....

Everything happens for a reason.
I sometimes question that saying..
Sometimes things happen that I don't understand at all. And it seems the only reason that they happened is to hurt someone. And who likes to see people suffer? So many things happen that I wish wouldn't. But a lot of times I learn from them. And they mostly make me stronger. But it never really changes the fact that I wish they wouldn't happen. Or at least not the way that they did.

I upset myself a lot. And I disappoint myself with some of the things I do, or say. I don't like myself. I really wish I did, but no. I don't like myself one bit. I'm not happy with myself, nor am I happy with where I'm at in life. It feels like I'm stuck, in a point in time. Not moving. I need to feel like I'm moving forward. I need to feel like I'm progressing. And I don't.

I don't like feeling like I've been at the same spot for a long time. I don't like feeling like I'm not going anywhere, and I'm not moving.

I need to be pushed. When I set myself up to do something, I'm not going to back down. I don't want to give up. I need to push myself. And I need others to push me. To keep going.

I hate feeling like I can't talk to someone. I hate feeling like I have no one to have a deep conversation with.
I guess it's because I hardly have anybody.
I wish there were more people willing to sit down and just talk.

I would much rather have a deep conversation with somebody than do something fun, like dance.

I hate the mood that I'm in 93% of the time. And that would be because it's not a good mood.
I'm normally sad these days. :/ I want to meet someone who can change that.
That someone would be my best friend. : ) My angel : ) My everything : ) and My hero.

Will you be my hero?

I've come to realize that everyone makes mistakes.
And I shouldn't smother myself with shame and guilt.
I should probably let go of things more easily and forgive myself.
I forgive others more easily than I do myself.

I have run out of things to write about : )